Wednesday, January 13, 2016

Wednesday Wordage: the Farmer in the...place of the adjective

I am developing more and more of an appreciation of the farmer's life--a way of life that used to be the norm.  There's still some things that are so associated with the farmer life that "farmer" becomes adjectival.  The "farmer tan" needs no introduction.  Bikers clear their noses with a "farmer blow." Surfers wear "farmer john" wetsuits.  But as I become more immersed in the lifestyle, other farmer things have been making themselves apparent to me:

Farmercize:  I marvel that people pay money to go to a gym to exercise.  Heck, they can come here to exercise and I'll pay them.  Mucking out the barn, trimming hooves on all the goats, stacking hay bales, fencing, building...my arms are more muscle-y than they ever got from skiing or swimming or weights or anything.  

Farmer shuffle:  It's the way I walk at the end of pretty much every day, each step a separate process, as a result of all the farmercize.

Farmer sauna:  You don't need to go to Finland for the proper sauna experience: just load eight tons of hay into your barn as the sun is going down and the temperature is dropping into the  20's F.  You get the moist heat from sweating up a storm; the birch-twig effect from all the hay scratching at you; and the roll-in-the-snow effect from walking back to the house in the freezing air wearing a sweat-soaked t-shirt.

Farmer-built:  Sort of functional, awkward to use, and must include baling twine.

Farmer diet:  Guaranteed weight loss!  Eat as much as you want, of whatever you want (after all the work is done).

Farmer birth control:  I mean, really, who has the energy at the end of the day?

I'll probably come to learn more...

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