Breakfast with Boocoo and Sneggy

Breakfast with Boocoo and Sneggy: a caprine caper.

Dramatis Personae:

Human . . . . . . . A human

Boocoo . . . . . . . A goat kid

Sneggy . . . . . . . . A goat kid

Scene: barn, exterior.  After noises of struggle, enter two goat kids, on leads, pulling human.  The goat kids surge towards two bowls of grain mix, while the human ties their leads to a hitching post--making sure that there is no way that one goat can get to the other's grain.

Boocoo:  Food!  FoodfoodfoodfoodfoooooodFOOD! (very loud munching noises)

Sneggy:  Food!  FoodfoodfoodfoodfoooooodFOOD!  Hey!  This is food, mostly.  (Looks at human, then nibbles at food)

Boocoo:  (very loud munching noises)

Sneggy:  (nibbling noises)  Hey, was that a sheep I heard?  (looks around; stares, at length, into the distance)

Boocoo:  (very loud munching noises)

Sneggy:  (Still staring)  Pretty sure that was a sheep...

Human:  Sneggy!  Focus!  Eat!  (jiggles bowl of grain)

Sneggy:  Hey!  There's food here.  (Looks at human, then nibbles at food)

Boocoo:  (very loud munching noises)

Sneggy:  (nibbling noises) Wait--I think I heard a log truck...yes, yes...definitely a log truck.  You know that they have log trucks going by on the road there?  (stares, at length, at the road)

Boocoo:  (very loud munching noises)

Human:  Sneggy!  Focus!  Eat!  (jiggles bowl of grain)

Sneggy:  Hey!  There's food here.  Did you know there's food here?  (Looks at human, then nibbles at food)

Boocoo:  (very loud munching noises)

Sneggy:  (nibbling noises)  Hey!   Did you you know that there are dried peas in this grain mix?  And alfalfa pellets?  did you know that I don't really like them?  (stares at human, aggrieved; starts to wander around, tangling leash on hitching post.)

Boocoo:  (very loud munching noises; these stop, as there is no more grain.  loud whuffling noises, as goat tries to vacuum up bits of grain dust)

Human:  (jiggling Sneggy's grain bowl) Sneggy!  Focus!  Eat!  Look--lots of barley, corn, oilseed, calf manna--lots of good stuff!

Sneggy:  Wow!  There's food here!  Where did that come from?!  (Looks at human, then nibbles at food)

Boocoo:  (straining at lead, trying to reach Sneggy's bowl)

Sneggy:  (nibbling noises; pauses)  You know, there's a really nice view of those hills from here.  I could just stand here and stare, and stare, and stare, and stare, and...are those cows over there? Cows are kind of neat.  They're like giant goats, really.  Cows eat grass, you know.  There's grass here.  I wonder how grass looks to a cow.  I wonder how grass looks to a crow.  I heard a crow once.  I heard a raven, too.  Crows are different from ravens.  Ravens and crows and cows.  It's weird that crows and cows are so different, but only differ in spelling by one letter.  If things made sense, I think ravens should be called cows.  But then ravens would have to eat grass...(verbal wandering is paralleled by wandering around on lead; at this point, walks through food bowl, catches side, flinging contents over entire porch.)

Sneggy:  Ooooo!  That was food!  Where did that come from?!  Somebody should clean it up. 

Boocoo:  Ooooo!  Food!  FoodfoodfoodfoodfoooooodFOOD! (very loud munching noises) 

Human:  ******!!!!!